Thursday, November 28, 2013

A little thankfullness (and reflection on last thanksgiving)

Since thanksgiving seems to be a time of reflection and contemplation I thought I would jump on the band wagon and take some time to look back a year ago. Honestly, sometimes I'm afraid to look back to deep. Last year this time was hard. My grandpa was very sick and we were going through changes in our family. I was so focused on adoption I think I overlooked a lot of things and some days forgot to be thankful for the things I did have. I couldn't see past the waiting list and the urge to know who are child was. Then I got the call that my grandpa had made the decision to stop all medical assistance and would pass very soon.

I still get teary when I think about those few days, both in sadness and in adoration. You see my family may appear on the outside as "The crazy Hobbs" but we are also amazingly connected. 

All of my aunts uncles and cousins descended upon Quincy and loved on each other. We all took turns talking with grandpa, telling him stories and listening to him slowly relive some of his life memories under mild pain meds. My grandpa was an amazing man and in his death I saw the beauty of life and family.

We all worked together to help bring both grandma and grandpa home where grandpa could have his last few hours in a place of comfort and familiarity. I was able to be with him when he died, surrounded by many of his family as we all told him we loved him and would see him again. I think God was able to use those days of grief and sorrow to remind me how valuable family is. You see, when we began helping grandma through her things in the house we found files of grandpas. They were clearly labeled for each of his children and grandchildren. Now my grandpa had 6 children and 14 grandchildren (if I'm counting correctly) and he had a file for each one. With in those files were newspaper clippings and photos and letters. He had saved any printed material about our accomplishments and just us. This still impacts me today as I think of the love and adoration he and my grandma have for each one of us that has now been passed down generation to generation.

This year as I gather with my family again to celebrate the holiday I am reminded again of families and all that I have to be thankful for. In the prayers of my father, the giggles of our children, a babies call for Na-na, in the thankfulness of our children, face-time conversations oceans apart and my grandma watching us knowing that life does go one. It may not be the same, it certainly is not easy at times and can be very very hard but yet life still goes on.


Tuesday, November 12, 2013

So what is Noonday?

I shared with you why I choose Noonday but I wanted to show you what the Noonday Collection really is.

It's about people like this in Uganda ...

          That make jewelry like this.....


 Or women like this in India...

Who make jewelry like this.....


It can be about hosting a trunk show to help someone do this 


Or just to have a fun time like this

 Each piece is hand made by an artisan who because of your purchase gets to make a change in their life.
Want to find out more about The Noonday Collection and owning your own piece while making a difference to someone else? 

Check out my new website 
Thank you for letting me share a little of my new found passion with you!


Friday, November 8, 2013

A little announcement

I have been writing lately how my heart has been changed. My eyes and heart have been opened to seeing the world more as God wants me to see it. Im looking at things differently. I have started to question my purchases and look at the reason why I am buying something and where it is coming from. I have seen injustice and poverty up close and personal. I have a sweet little boy sleeping in the other room that lived it daily. I have heard the stories in person, seen the faces of these women and thier children. my child and I want to make a change. I have spent some time seeing what direction God is leading me and that is why I am so very excited to share this with you!

                  I have decided to become a Noonday Ambassador!

What is The Noonday Collection you ask?
     Noonday grew out of a dream to aide women in the US a way to add extra income while at the same time creating pathways out of poverty for the vulnerable.  Thus the business of alleviating poverty through entrepreneurship was created. Noonday offers you an opportunity to use your purchasing power to create change in the world {while looking really good along the way}. Your fashion sense can now restore dignity to abandoned women in Ethiopia, empower communities in Ecuador, and create business opportunities for Ugandans. And the great thing about their jewelry is not only are they stunning pieces but each and every piece is hand created by an artisan. Each piece has a person with a story behind it.

By hosting a trunk show, you're giving others the opportunity to do more, to be a voice for the voiceless, you're doing your part to change the world.

My website should be up and running later this week and I hope to be sharing more with you from the Noonday Collection!



Friday, November 1, 2013

Adding a little Love in the Marriage

Through out my little blogging excursions I have found how little people write about how changes in the family really affect the marriage. I can't just sit back and blog truthfully about this journey and provide support to others with out detailing our own journey, including our marriage. So sit down and leave judgement at the door folks.

We are love language people in our home (Don't know what I'm talking about-check it out here at Gary Chapman's Website)  I am a time and touch kinda gal. (head out of the gutter people-touch as in physical contact not just hanky-panky)  Gene on the other hand is a bit of acts of service/words of affirmation man. In other words-NOT RELATED.  I want him to listen and touch me while he likes me to do things for him and say sweet things. My idea of a date is cuddling by a fire sharing our innermost feelings while his is me making a sandwich, bringing him a drink and telling him how awesome he is. See the difference!

And yet here we are love bugs 10 years ago...

When you add another child in the home (whether birth or adoption) the relationship goes on the back burner. You are so focused on taking care of this new person in the family you kinda forget the big person working along side of you. My need of time and touch has gone out the window as 1 we have no time and 2 the time he does have is spent loving on our children and managing all our small projects. So by bedtime Gene has been a human jungle gym and maintenance man for a few hours. The farthest thing from his mind is time and touch- he is ready for some peace and quiet alone. Meanwhile I spend the day providing words of affirmation to my students and regular acts of service to two teenagers (i.e.laundry, food, driving) while simultaneously entertaining, playing and cleaning up after the Little's that after bed time I'm done doing things for others. Which has led to our breakdown of the care and attention to our marriage.

For us, we have been so caught up in just simply meeting the individual needs of four children we ourselves have just stopped working on the marriage and that my friends is a dangerous place! When your not loving your partner thoughts of righteousness and pride get in the way. We (and by we I mean I) begin to judge the actions they make and the feelings of contempt and irritability start creeping on in.

We knew we needed an intervention. When the hanky- panky declines and is replaced by bitter thoughts (and in my case words)  its time to push that relationship to #1. That meant it was time for an honest talk. Now let me ask you, why does it have to be so dang hard to share how you are feeling and what you need to your spouse? As a woman I think we play the F.I.N.E (Feelings Inside Not Expressed) game way to much! Our poor men cant tell what the heck we are thinking because we complain and then when the ask us whats wrong we do the whole "I'm FINE..." or the "Whatever-I don't care". Come on Ladies-  know I'm not the only one here-right!?! We  (I mean I) have to do a much better job at sharing my thoughts and feelings and actually speaking up when I need something. Believe it or not, men really can not read our minds. (Check out Ted Cunningham at Woodland Hills Family Church for his videos on Great Parents-Lousy Lover)

Anyway-back to the pushing to #1...

I called in Operation- Date Night. Just what a marriage needs for a little mini rejuvenation and attention. Since we are still working on our bonding and attachment we had dinner all ready and reviewed our plan with the new little one about 10 times. My parents came to the house to watch the kids so we didn't disrupt the routine too much and they could go to bed when we were gone.

Photo: First date night post-ethiopia and Nati !

We had the typical rural town date night- dinner and a movie. We went all out and Geno took me to Wendy's (I know- we splurged- I even made it a large-this is what happens when God makes you think about where your money goes) then we saw a movie. What got me was in the middle of our dinner I was sitting across from Gene having a normal conversation starting into his eyes and felt completely at peace and loved. This man was listening and actually cared about my gibber jabber. I don't think we had been able to have a full conversation about nothing in particular in 5 months just the two of us with out being completely exhausted.

I hope that whatever stage you are in your marriage that you are putting time and commitment into it. Life is tough and life as a single parent is even harder. Make time for your spouse and show them a little love! Marriage is work and only grows through daily sacrifice and commitment. In my blog excursion my rockin' fellow adoptive mom at BecomingMichelle is doing a 31 days of my marriage and has partnered with an awesome couple Tony and Michelle on their blog #stay married.  Follow their blogs for further insight into marriage and some awesome note cards (I may have a specific one up on a door night now waiting for a special someone-try to guess which one it is- its in the shape of a donkey...hopefully words of forgiveness fall under affirmation!)